Patient, Female
Audiobook

Patient, Female, by Julie Schumacher

By Julie Schumacher

Read by Hillary Huber

🎧 9 hours 📘 Blackstone Publishing 📅 5 May 2026 🌐 English

About this Audiobook

β€œShrewd, sage, and so darkly funny.” – Claire Lombardo, author of The Most Fun We Ever Had

From the New York Times bestselling author of Dear Committee Members, a collection of wryly funny stories about ordinary women – in all their complexity, fallibility, and humanity.

An unsuspecting couple is treated to a luxury vacation by their deceased neighbor. After begrudgingly agreeing to volunteer at a nursing home, a middle school girl gambles over games of bridge with elderly residents. A single mother struggles to understand the unique bond between her autistic son and his dying grandmother. Four friends experience decades of highs and lows as pawns in The Game of Life. A professional gynecology patient runs into a high school flame while at work, undressed, on the job.

In this irreverent collection, celebrated novelist Julie Schumacher balances sorrow against laughter. Here, we experience story not only as narrative, but as syllabus and as board game. Each protagonist – ranging from girlhood to senescence – receives her own indelible voice as she navigates social blunders, generational misunderstandings, and the absurdity of the human experience. Exquisitely honest and expertly crafted, Patient, Female renders – with dark humor and wit – the foibles of human behavior and our endearing imperfections.

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Clara’s Verdict

Julie Schumacher is one of those writers who manages to be genuinely funny about things that are not especially funny – the accumulating indignities of ordinary life, the comedy of miscommunication, the absurdity lurking beneath social surfaces. Patient, Female is a short story collection, and in audio form it becomes something close to a recital: each story complete in itself, each voice distinct, the whole adding up to something more than the sum of its parts. Claire Lombardo’s cover quote – “shrewd, sage, and so darkly funny” – is accurate to the point of being almost redundant. This is very good indeed.

About the Audiobook

Schumacher’s previous novel, Dear Committee Members, built a devoted following on the strength of its epistolary wit and its unsparing eye for academic life. Patient, Female is a different beast: a collection of stories about women at various stages of life, each navigating something – loss, obligation, embarrassment, love – with varying degrees of success and self-awareness.

The range is impressive. An unsuspecting couple inherits a luxury holiday from their recently deceased neighbour. A middle-schooler volunteers reluctantly at a nursing home and discovers bridge – and something else entirely – with the residents. A single mother watches the unexpected bond between her autistic son and his dying grandmother. Four women play through decades of friendship as pieces in a game of Life. A professional gynaecology patient runs into a high school flame at the worst possible moment.

Schumacher is interested in women who are ordinary in the best sense: fallible, complex, coping imperfectly with circumstances that don’t yield to simple solutions. The humour is dark but never mean, the empathy is precise rather than sentimental. In audio format, the collection runs to nine hours – substantial for a short story collection, and well worth every minute.

The Narration

Hillary Huber narrates, and she is an excellent match for Schumacher’s material. Huber has a dry, intelligent delivery that catches the irony in Schumacher’s prose without underlining it, and her range across the collection’s different protagonists is quietly impressive. The tonal shifts between comedy and something more affecting are handled with real skill. This is narration that serves the writing rather than competing with it.

What Readers Say

As a recent release, listener reviews are still coming in – but Schumacher’s reputation precedes this collection, and early response has been enthusiastic. Fans of Dear Committee Members note that the short story format suits her voice particularly well, allowing the comic timing that her novels develop over hundreds of pages to land with more concentrated force. Readers new to Schumacher have found it an ideal entry point into her work.

Who Should Listen?

For anyone who likes literary short fiction with genuine wit – think Grace Paley, Lorrie Moore, or more recently Ottessa Moshfegh at her most accessible. It’s an ideal listen for commuters who find full-length novels hard to track across fragmented listening sessions, since each story is self-contained. Strongly recommended for book club listening, where individual stories can generate excellent discussion. If you liked Dear Committee Members, this is essential.

Available now on Audible UK – listen to Patient, Female by Julie Schumacher.

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Frequently asked questions

How long is the Patient, Female audiobook?

The unabridged audiobook runs for 9 hours.

Who narrates Patient, Female?

This audiobook is narrated by Hillary Huber.

Can I listen to Patient, Female for free?

Yes: new Audible UK members get a 30-day free trial with 1 credit, enough for this audiobook whatever its retail price. Our free audiobooks guide lists every other legal option.

Patient, Female

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Clara Whitmore

By Clara Whitmore

Founder & Literary Critic